Thanos, a philosophy and economics double major who thinks once you eat a plant it will never grow back: i have to slaughter half the universe’s population with the infinity stones, so that no one ever runs out of resources and starves
Thor, a phys ed and linguistics major with a minor in women’s studies, taking a sip of his strawberry protein shake: can’t you just use the infinity stones to create more resources tho?
Thanos: blocked
Thor is like….waaaaay more educated than that but these areas of emphasis are lovely.
Sometimes I’m just sitting here minding my own business and then I remember that Thor specifically entrusted Loki with placing Surtur’s crown on the fire to initiate Ragnarok and I tear up a little bit because that’s how you love and support your chaotic neutral sibling.
Thor: I know what’ll cheer you up. 🙂 Loki: What’s that? Thor: You wanna trigger the apocalypse with me for the good of Asgard? Loki: !!!!!!!!
After everything that happened in Ragnarok, imagine Thor hearing about Steve and Tony’s fight and being like “Really?! Thats why you all stopped working together?! Just get over it! I did! I’m still friends with Loki and he’s betrayed me three times since breakfast! This petty mortal shit is nothing!”
Loki: “Can confirm, poisoning his mead right now.”
Thor: “Ha! I’ve built up an immunity.”
Now I feel I was cheated on Civil War
Steve: “Well, we disagreed about this big political thing, and I mean big – almost every country in the world was involved.”
Thor: *nodding* “Right.”
Steve: “So we started to fight, I mean really fight. We each had about half a dozen friends backing us up.”
Thor: *nodding* “Always best to bring your friends along”
Steve: “And by the end, it was just me and Tony, and we… we really pounded each other…. no holding back.”
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